I don’t have classes every Friday, so I decided to continue reading the book I haven’t finished reading. (It Ends With Us). Who would have thought that I would sob until 2am? Shame on me. While reading, I remembered a lot of childhood scenarios. I can relate to the protagonist of this novel— Lily. No, not the rated r scenes. lol.
Kidding aside. Let me share with you some of my takeaways that I could put into words. But first, let me describe the characters that I’ve bumped into:
Ryle is a fine doctor, but has anger issues. Definitely a jerk. He’s just a victim of his past. He went through a lot in childhood, but don’t get me wrong, I’m not trying to excuse his abusive behavior. We don’t tolerate that.
Lily has daddy issues. A strong woman. Her endurance is making me cry. Kind of dumb in terms of love, but I won’t blame her. She’s really loving; even when she’s been hurt, she still thinks about those people she loves. She’s dumb, but I won’t blame her for that either. She’s just a human.
Atlas is a good guy. Period. I want him for me. lol.
Allysa is nice. A very good friend. She knows Lily very well.
Marshall is hilarious. I like his relationship with Allysa. It freaks me out in some ways.
Let’s not talk about Lucy… She’s annoying.
And then, Rylee and Emmy (I pity her real name), are gorgeous.
Prior to reading this novel, I assumed it was about a love triangle. A hoax. I don’t want to ruin your day but… this is not a typical romantic novel that will make you laugh and yearn for love. Personally, I don’t believe it’s a love tale at all. It Ends With Us is the story of a daughter who witnesses her mother being abused by someone who should have protected them. It’s about a woman who finds herself in a situation she’s always tried to avoid; i love how she handled that. She learns. It tells the story of a strong woman who refuses to accept abusive behavior again and is brave enough to break the cycle to ensure that it won’t happen to her child.
- Do not settle for less than you deserve.
You should know your worth. You should know your limit. You should know when to leave. You are worth so much more.
If someone truly loved you, they wouldn’t do anything to hurt you. Period.
One day, there will be a confident man who will come into your life and will do everything just to win your heart.
- Never commit yourself to someone if you haven’t moved on from your past lover.
It will only cause huge destruction to you and your relationship. Avoid that situation.
- Choose a good man
—a good spouse, a good father to your future children, a good son-in-law, and a good friend. You must remember that your child has no power to choose their father but you. Do not let your feelings make decisions for you. Some men are only good in the beginning. Choose a consistent man. A loving one.
And lastly…it taught me to
- Just keep swimming
That no matter how hard the world is, just keep swimming. Even if the waves seem so big and will overpower you. Just keep swimming.
I understand why the abused didn’t leave the abuser that easily.
Just because someone hurts you doesn’t mean you can simply stop loving them. It’s not a person’s actions. that hurt the most. It’s the love. If there was no love attached to the action, the pain would be a little easier to bear
—Lily
Our first thought might be—they are stupid. I learned that they are not weak for giving their abusers hundreds of chances. They simply love them in such a way that they accept their empty promises, “It was an accident. I will not do it again. I promise.” But everyone has a limit. According to Lily’s mom: when you love someone, your limits will adjust and adjust. . . and adjust because you don’t want to lose them, even if it means losing sight of who you are and how you should be treated. It’s all because you want to keep them.
My head hurts.
This book gave me so much emotions. I understand why Lily didn’t leave Ryle that fast. I understand why Johnny Depp took years to expose Amber. I understand why Lily’s mother didn’t leave her father until he got sick and breathed his last breath. And lastly, I understand why my mother didn’t leave Papa. I understand why she never leaves, despite only-God-knows-how-long and how many times my father cheated on her. Love is the suspect. and is proven guilty.
But who could have blamed her? When I was 9 years old, I thought my mother was weak. I remember entering my parents’ room and seeing my mom sobbing. Though, I’ve seen that several times in a row. At that age, I couldn’t identify what emotion I was feeling, but what I can be certain of is that it crashed me inside. I hated her for not leaving and letting him treat her that way. But that’s completely different when you have a family of your own. You would go to any length simply to keep them. But do you actually maintain them whole, or do you merely keep them appearing that way on the outside? Only on the outside.
People spend a lot of time trying to figure out why women don’t leave. Where are all the folks who are perplexed as to why some guys are so abusive? Isn’t it the only place where blame should be placed?
Until death do us part, remember?
but love doesn’t have to be like that. Does it?
Cycles are real.
It won’t stop until there’s someone who’s brave enough to end it.
Lily is brave.
—Red📍
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Writings of Red 